As his feet are swept from beneath him, non-binary high school student Nex Benedict slams onto the bathroom floor, nearly blacked out and badly bruised. To call this attack anything other than bullying or a hate crime would be disingenuous.
On February 7, at Owasso High School, Nex Benedict was attacked by a group of 3 older classmates. The very next day, Benedict died from suicide, as ruled by the medical examiner.
The medical examiner’s report found the cause of death to be a lethal combination of antidepressants and antihistamines, according to The Washington Post.
The abuse, violence, and bullying in our school system are often dismissed and under-addressed, especially when it comes to students whose identities frequently bring them enough harassment as is.
LGBTQ+ teenagers are often at the forefront of this harassment, subjected to taunting side remarks and rude comments. The undeniable reality is that LGBTQ+ students still struggle with being accepted.
“It sucks, you know? It sucks that we live in this world where these kinds of things happen,” Judson High School junior Emily Colvard said.
Colvard is a transgender student here at Judson, who often finds it hard to feel accepted in certain educational and social spaces. Amidst, all she’s faced, Colvard has found the courage to freely express her identity how she pleases.
However, for Colvard, a horrifying threat will always loom. The same danger that stripped Benedict of the security and safety that school systems are meant to provide.
“It could have easily been me. It could have been one of the dozens of other queer people I know,” Colvard said. “There were many people that knew Nex, that loved them. This one unnecessary event threw everything away.”
The problem of intolerance in youth has many deep-rooted causes. From the household to the internet, harmful ideals and mindsets are always floating around.
“It always comes back to our culture, and the things we’re fed on social media. I just feel like there’s just not enough communication between the two sides of the conversation. No one’s really listening to each other,” said Judson’s at-risk counselor Mrs. Thompson.
Mrs. Thompson co-advised the Gay-Straight Alliance club up until this year, and she has a heart for those with unique identities. For some, LGBTQ+ safe spaces in school – whether it be a teacher’s classroom or a club- are the only places they can freely express themselves.
“While I was struggling, I had a few teachers who would take notice and definitely helped out,” Colvard said. “In those classes, I didn’t experience the kind of stuff that I had previously.”
The question of the matter is: how do we help LGBTQ+ teens feel safe and respected no matter where they are in school? Colvard believes schools should play a role in creating a solution.
“Schools aren’t meant to just teach information. They’re meant to teach how to be a good person. How to live in the world we do, and not leave it worse than how it was when you came into it,” Colvard said.
However, it’s hard to maintain the balance between ensuring all students are protected and validated, and catering to the sometimes harsh attitudes of parents and the public. Still, according to Ms. Thompson, there’s a way that schools can even the scales.
“I think you can teach students acceptance without having to stand on either side. It’s kind of like the golden rule,” Mrs. Thompson said. “Be good to others, and they’ll be good to you. I mean, that’s very simple.”
We must start with basic ideas, like treating others with respect and kindness, and continue reinforcing these values throughout the school year. Schools have no control over the values and ideas teens learn at home, but they can do their part in teaching social tolerance and acceptance.
“A person’s sexuality or gender identity is not causing inherent harm in any way, shape, or form. So if it doesn’t do you or the world any harm, then acknowledge that, respect that, and be okay with that,” Colvard said.